I've made the stride to vegetarian.

Im enjoying this rainy weather.
I miss hanging with my good group of friends everyday during the winter.
Such fun times.
I cant wait for Saturday.Gunna be so much fun.All i want is a fun day
with my friends just hanging out,then a sweet show to end it.Corny as that sounds.
Im sick of bad moods and shitty days with friends.
Jonathan Copeland is the only person i can talk to at this point in life.You know that.



Saturday should be fucking awesome!

Its good.

Where am i in life.I don't have a job,im doing horrible in school.Im not doing much with myself.Im just sitting processing things about me.I would like someone to spend my days with.Someone that i can call on a good,bad,rainy,sunny,day.Someone that will just keep me company.Make memories with.A special someone that will stay out all night with me.Talk the night away with me.Just someone who will get me to express my feelings.That will brake me out of my shell.Are you out there?



Because im in need of you.

Whats the point of anything.There is nothing looking up for me.Im fucking hopeless.

The RAD skatepark in mendon is a cool venue.

SSE

I have been taking a lot more pride in stoughton straight edge.Ever since everyone has actually been talking and wanting to make this a bigger better thing it makes me realize that im proud.I'm proud that i can be a younger generation and still be part of something like this.Ive become sick of trying to impress people who mean nothing to me.I'm going to keep living life like i want.
I'm giving up on caring about people think.That's not a way to live.

I miss you..

I don't wanna say im depressed,because im honestly to young to be.But a majority of the time i feel like shit.Things never work out for me.Things are always going wrong around me.Ive had two tragic deaths in the past month.The first was my dog tessie which i still miss deeply.Then 3 days ago my cousin scott passed.He was 25 years old,a marine,caption of his collage football team.Still in shock over this whole situation.Its a hard thing for me to process that i will never see him again.The wake is tomorrow,and the funeral is Friday.I don't know how to take this situation i seriously don't.I have been writing this over the time span of an hour.I don't know what to say besides that you will be missed deeply scott.


RIP

RIP SCOTT

My cousin Scott passed away two days ago.I haven't really come to terms with it yet.It doesn't seem real.My family is taking this bad.Though we have had many deaths in our family this one was the most unexpected and tragic.Scott was only 25 years old.Its a hard thing to think about just knowing that you will never see him again.The wake is Thursday,and the funeral is Friday.Though im coping with it now,when Friday comes around i think everything is going to set in and im going to realize that hes gone.Its just a hard thing to process.
REST IN PIECE SCOTT.
YOUR VERY WELL MISSED.
IF ONLY THIS NEVER HAPPENED..

All those memories

I need a friend.Yes i have friends but i seem like im losing all of them just because ide rather just hangout and enjoy each others company then rather go to a party,or just be social.And not to help,im about to lose the one person who i need the most right now.I come home and sit in my room.I do this all week.Every day is the same.I write,and come to realize that isn't helping me anymore re leave stress.I cant stand my school,and a single fucking person in it.At this point and time i feel like im the only one walking this planet.I don't like showing my feelings.Unless its anger or being upset about something.And im trying to change that,but its a hard thing for me.I guess in a way im just slowly rotting away.Right along with this town..

Ive lost everything.This is all i have left.

I have had enough of this life.I cant sleep anymore.I cant even open my eyes and look around without feeling like its not worth living.The one thing that would of brought me out of this slump slipped from under me and i lost it.The one thing that would of made everything worth living i fucking lost.
And all that's left,is a constant miss understanding.And a heart not worth mending.

Fuck

Sun down Sun up
I speak in sarcasm to relate to all the things i appreciate
I
lie in rhythm to open doors I follow suit and just want more
My reputation is
the same its been and I don't care what happens
I read the book so I know the
end
I've probably said too much
But I've never felt more accomplished
I'm
losing sleep
I'm losing friends
I've got a love hate love
With the city I'm
in
I'll count the hours
Having just one wish
If I'm doing fine
There's no
point to this.

Im lost

im so sick of always hearing,all those sad songs on the radio
all day its there to remind another sensitive guy that hes lost and alone
i hate a favorite restaurant,a favorite movie,or favorite show
we would stay all up through the night we would laugh and not lie,never answer the phone

i cant forgive
i cant forget
cant give in
what went wrong cause you said this was right

you fucked up my life...

So

i finally saw title fight.It was so good.It was a good show and a fun night until two tough guys decided to try and jump my friend.Other than that it was sweet seeing title fight.Borderlands new stuff is Very good as well.I don't know were i really stand at this point.For a while i was feeling like a was in a black box and i couldn't open my eyes.But it seems like every thing is brighter,better.Lets hope things stay this way.I don't wanna go back to that feeling again.Ever....

one month

Today is thursday march 5.And its also one month that tessie mae has been gone.I stayed home today because I have to much on my mind.When I thaught things we're starting to look up,well I guess I just got my hopes up.Just laying here I can't believe you've all ready been gone a month,I still feel the same pain as if it just happened last night.Maybe something will go my way.I dony want anymore negative in my life.

.

I fucking lost everything.At this point nothing fucking matters.I really wouldn't care if this whole world came to an end.My head is so lost and confused.Say what you really mean cause I don't fucking care.IJustDontCare.
Are you scared of being alone?
Cause I am,im lost with out you.
Are you scared of leaving tonight?
Cause I am,im lost with out you.

Have Heart

is tomorrow in brockton,and im going by myself.Thats gunna suck.I hate school.Im happy tomorrows friday.FuckingHangMe.

I've never been so close

To actually killing myslef.You've made me sick to my stomach and lead me on.But ill let my frustration out tomorrow at last lights.At this point I really just wanna fucking rot away.I don't wanna be found.You've played with my head for the last time.Things just won't be the same,you can keep living how you want.But if you want you can rot with me...

.

You really haven't changed.You got me thinking positive again and now look at me im back in the fucking drain.Iwannahangmyself.
Last lights Saturday is where im letting out all what you did to me.Everything.

Once again

I get my hopes up for nothing.Once again you fucked with my head.How do you feel about it?Because me,everything is down hill from here.
Though the youth has hope,give them enough rope,and they'll hang themselves from wedding bells.

Valentines day

I hate it.There's some one i care for,but that doesn't change the fact that they will care for me.This day is to make you feel lonelier agree with me or not.I still haven't got over the fact that my best friend is gone.Tessie Mae.Some people don't realize how close you get to a pet,me and the days are rotting with out you.Nothings works out for me.Nothing ever wants to go my way.REST IN PEICE TESSIE MAE.
Every night i go to sleep wishing that the world wont forget about me....

pat sullivans car

Looking at kyles tattoo.Its pretty phr3$h.so yeah this is kinda awkward.Like I kind of wanna leave right now.Alright see ya...

I enjoy

listening to title fight
thats about it

just save

i dont have words to explain.I have two friends,but they always have things going on.When there busy im alone.When im in school i cant get out of my seat.I feel like every one is looking and judging me.You can be the biggest piece of scum,and i care to much what you think.I cant stand anyone in my school.Thats not an exaderation,i fucking hate all of you.You think your something your not.Why cant i be alone forever.Why....

...

So its sunday at like 10 in the morning.Its snowing pretty hard out,but im stuck at my moms.I guess stories and this alone are going to do another show.That's cool,there pretty goon local bands.Im dreading school tommorrow,I hate you all.Im not the man I use to be,im doing my best to change,but its so hard to change as this world looks down on me.

so...

Its tuesday morning and im dreading school.we just came back from vacation.Vacation was alright,nothing to brag about I guess.I hope this year is a lot better.There is a dom benefit show this weekend that im hoping I can get to.Verse is playing.There good.I hate school....